Why I Decided to Join the Club…
The only way to discover a true treasure is to dig deeper into the soil
When you’re alone in a 4-cornered room, especially that we’re still in the midst of a pandemic: be it in your bedroom or a coffee shop, chances are in an any given moment, you’ll get bored and feel as if time seems to swift slowly, like a turtle and you’ll suddenly realize that you need to do something in order to get your hands busy or to divert your attention from the boredom that you’re feeling. Many thoughts and ideas came rushing through your mind as you wander on the things that might make the time pass more quickly. You sort into a temporary solution — chatting with some friends on social media or calling a dearest friend to let some steam out and somehow talk a little about life.
If you’re a person who gets bored easily like I do, you probably experienced this a couple of times in your life wherein you do something or talk to someone for a while, these gives you some satisfaction but then you realized that ‘something was off’ and then you drastically switch from one thing to another, and the cycle goes on. And perhaps afterwards, you’ll get a feeling of regret and resentment from that situation. Well, you think to yourself: “life must go on, no matter what.”
If you’re an introvert that loves to speak your mind indirectly, or someone whose brain is exploding with thoughts probably sorted on doing something interesting or crafty because, all of us have our hidden talents that we haven’t unleashed yet, or perhaps your inner child is screaming that creativity of yours.
I would like to share with you a story when I was young. I have so many dreams that I wanted to accomplish, but there’s a feeling of uncertainty if I’m going to make it or not. As an only child, I lack that motivation and feel anxious all the time as I was not trained and guided at a young age how to act accordingly based on my emotions because I grew up in a strict household and away from my parents that sometimes, opening something and venting out have became a difficult task for me as I feel like no one can understand how I feel except me.
That is, when I came across a pen and a paper that I started writing my heart out whenever I feel upset, or any kind of emotion that I am feeling, which acts as my coping mechanism when I need to. I remembered this time in primary school wherein because of bullying, I became distant with others, learned to bottle up my emotions, and when I got home I rushed to get that notebook which I always started with “Dear Diary…” and there I write what happened with my day, my wishes, my dreams, and my desires. Sometimes, when I am longing for someone, I even wrote about them and that became a habit of mine since then. Furthermore, when I reached high school, English was my favorite subject especially when we have an activity of essay-writing or just doing some reflection paper, acing it was like a trophy for me because there, I can pour my emotions and indirectly tell the readers how I felt or how I wanted my opinions to be heard and for me to feel understood.
Because of my eagerness to come up with this idea of writing, I tried writing my own story once with different characters in it, depicting the personality of the people I encountered and those around me, as well as the experiences I had with them, may it be a pleasant or unpleasant ones. But that story wasn’t a success as it is full of negative energies and a roller coaster of emotions that’s why I give up on that and sort into writing essays with pleasing topics which geared towards positivity as well as writing on my journal instead.
There’s a truth in the metonymy by Edward Bulwer- Lytton that the “pen is mightier than the sword,” which depicts that it is the best communication tool than violence.
I didn’t realize that writing was a hidden talent of mine which I discovered many years ago and the skills I have on putting words into paragraphs just like puzzle pieces was unbelievable of mine. This sort of a hobby I did a long time ago, that I am still doing today was now I considered to be a long- term passion. I even dreamed of becoming a writer someday but this might not be a tool for a full-time career in the future because I knew that my writing skills are not that fully honed as I still need to get a degree in this field if I wanted to have this as a full- time job. And I am currently in a field afar from writing so I guess I’ll just leave it here; there are still many different opportunities that might be better aimed for me but this thing won’t be thrown away for sure because this is a gift that should be cherished. ♥♥♥
